Tagged by "The STILL Bald Guy" (:P), here's a lowdown on the 9 top most things worn by Goofy alias me.
1. The 1200 watt issmile
2. My beaded necklace (which is around my neck all the freaking time!!)
3. My eyes a.k.a contact lenses
3. Mera fresh wala deo...dunno what I'd do without it
4. Bombay bangles.....Every time I wear these...I'm reminded of my AWESOME mumbai trip. :) :)
5. My daily office footwear...gosh! how I miss my floaters. :(
6. My school uniform!! (okay....I'm running outta things now!)
7. Mere vadde waale shades. :D
Aur ni hai!!! :( Only 7 things hain. Too bored to click more pics anyway. Take up as per your wish. :)
YAPPY BDAY!!!!!!!!!!
Author: bondgal_rulz / Labels: Birthday
I don't remember when I started talking to you.
But I remember that it did not feel like it was the first time I was talking to you.
I don't remember how many meaningful conversations we have had.
But I remember that every meaningless convo we have had added meaning to my life.
I don't remember if and when I have ever made you feel nice.
But I remember all the times when you did the same.
Cos, every moment spent with you does that.
May you keep smiling always and may you get to see your SRGay one day before he smokes himself to death. :P
And all the best for all your exams!! :)
Love you loads. :) :)
Dusk - that time of the day when light surrenders to the darkness around. When it's neither day nor night, quite like the much-talked about "grey".
The time when a husband, after a day's hard work, drives back home with the hopes of seeing his wife soon and enveloping her in his embrace.
The time when a wife frees herself from the household chores to get ready for her husband and lays out the dinner for him in anticipation of a great evening.
This is the time when I travel in my cab, (on some few lucky days) reminiscing about the day's events. Some bitter moments, some sweet, and some insanely irritating.
This is the time when random songs playing on the stereo make you go through a gamut of emotions.
Some make you smile despite yourself...and the cab driver looks up i the rear-view mirror wondering what's wrong with you.
Some make you lean your head against the car window and stare outside at the thousands of twinkling headlights. You see the traffic around you, but what you are looking at are random scenes from your life playing in front of your eyes.
And those of us who are lucky enough to have found their someone special inadvertently imagine their rosy future with them.
This is the time when you observe people around you - a group of young girls in an auto, all dressed up for a party; office people stuffed in a cab, glad to be on their way back home; the guy in the swanky car at the red light eyeing the light-eyed beauty in the bus and what not.
This is the time when I sit in my cab and switch off my cell to write this inane post.
Audrey's dead.
Don't try to wake her up.
She's still crying
The songs of tomorrow,
Which when she was alive
She used to sing out aloud,
But now she sings in silence.
I want to live,
She cried in my ears,
The echo still fills my mind.
I want to love,
She pleaded through her eyes,
I can still see them burning.
But my heart's burning too.
She used to be my light,
I used to be her shadow.
We used to walk together,
In the valleys of pain and tears.
She could not take it any longer.
Me neither.
Audreys' dead.
I am dead.
HAPPY BIRTH DAY!!!!!!!
Author: bondgal_rulz / Labels: Birthday
Today happens to be the birthday of a person who has learnt only to give and not receive.
Today happens to be the birthday of a person who has still manged to preserve his childish innocence.
Today happens to be the birthday of a person who has many a times brought about a much needed smile on my face.
Today happens to be the birthday of a person who thinks he is a teddy bear because he has been christened Bhaalu. :P
Today happens to be the birthday of a person who has been a friend, guide, punching bag (sorry!), and so much more that cannot be described in words. :)
HAPPY BIRTHDAY Karan!!!! :) :) :) :)
May you have the bestest life ever with all that there is that one can want. :)
God it's been long!!! Apologies to all the super cool people in Blogsville whose posts I have not been able to read for the past month or so!!! I'm really really hoping to catch up on your blogs soon!!
I have no idea where this post is going. The Bald Guy asked me to blog and here I am. I'm sorry though Baldie, I just did not feel like taking up a tag right now.
So in case you are on of those who are not on my FB friend list and are wondering where did I get lost, well, it's my job (bonded labour) that's been keeping me busy of late. Weekends, did someone say? Well, weekends I get up even earlier than weekdays to go for my early morning French classes. And then it's all really just a blur.
Oh ya!! Today there was a shooting being held near our institute. Some movie tentatively titled "Who Killed Jessica" / "System". It apparently stars Rani Mukherjee and Vidya Balan. We were coaxed into being present for a scene as journos. It was humongously irritating!!!
Movie - making is a tough task. I mean, we go into a theatre and watch a movie for three hours and sometimes even those three hours seem a burden. And here these guys shoot a one minute scene in two hours!!! I got so fed up that I ran, yes, I actually RAN away from that place when the location of the scene was to change from one room to the other.
Btw have you ever noticed that words which till some years back were thought of as abuses or swear words have now become words of endearment? Strange,no?
Anyway, The Bald Guy sent a beautiful sms today, which just has to be shared with the world at large. It goes:
I'm a lonely road of broken dreams
It's a boulevard I'm searching for.
These stars are all so dull
It's the moon that I'm searching for
Happiness is so angry at me
It's life that I'm searching for.
There is a crowd around me all the time
It's a friend I'm searching for.
My life is like a path
It's a destination I'm searching for.
Don't know what it is that I've lost
Maybe it is "ME" that I'm searching for......
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I think a lot of you will be able to identify with this. I was!!!
P.S. Sorry for the lame title. Couldn't think of anything. :D
HER
Call me crazy if you want to, but Aditya is all that I have in my mind right now!! It's like I'm back in eighth standard all over again!!! He comes to my table at looks at all those agonisingly boring excel worksheets and I have a super hard time trying to focus on what he's saying!!! If this continues, he'll soon start thinking of me as one of those dumb girls. :|
HIM
I'm so messed up. It's like Mansi is all that I look forward to in office. I go up to her desk every now and then and man does she smell awesome!! Now who can concentrate on work when you have got such an intoxicating smell emanating from two centimeters of your face. I could not even explain her properly what was to be done. No wonder she was looking so lost.
HER
Aditya changed his desk!! He's now only two desks away from where I sit!! And I can totally see him ALL the time!!! This is sure to increase the work productivity. So says our manager. :)
Yayieeee!!!!
HIM
So I have moved closer to Mansi's desk. On the pretext of working in a more well co-ordinated manner of course. I hope I'm not becoming too obvious. Wouldn't wanna come across as one of those over eager types....
HER
So!! The good news is that we have lunch together now!! Yeah baby!! That's like bonus time for me!! And of course, I get to know more about him from others....which is always helpful. :)
HIM
At lunch today, my colleagues asked me the reason for changing my seat! And that too in front of Mansi!! Yeah, she has lunch with us. :) Hopefully this will help break the barrier of the power equation.
HER
This is weird....like really weird. Even though it's now been some 3 days that I go for lunch with Aditya, it seems that I'm always tongue-tied in front of him! I mean, this is unnatural of me!! Very very unnatural!! I don't have anything to contribute, no witty remarks to make, no sarcasm in my speech when otherwise I'm brimming with all these things!
And somehow I just don't seem to be able to get his attention. Like, at all!!! Which sucks!! I have never, never had to try to get anyone's attention, EVER!! But this guy seems made of stone!! Maybe he does have someone in his life for whom he is very serious......
HIM
I'm playing it a little slow as I really did not want to scare her off. But it seems that she is least interested. She hardly speaks when we break for lunch, does not eat anything that I offer and is awfully lost, especially when I'm speaking!
Even if she is this shy naturally, I don't see things working out for us. I mean, I'm the shy and quiet one. If she's like this too, I wonder what'll happen! Maybe this was never a good idea.....
HER
Second day at my brand new job. Got introduced to my associate - my senior I'll be working with on a project. Seems sweet. But who knows!! They're all sweet in the beginning isn't it?? Anyway, I don't like this office. It's seems so mechanical. People, things, processes...everything!! And the long hours!! And NO cute/hot guys. :( :( God!! Help me survive!!
HIM
New employee in the office today. Finally I get some much needed help on the project. Seemed okay. I just hope she knows her stuff. I don't want to be training around a new joinee. I really don't have the time!!
HER
Spent most of the day working with Aditya. My associate. He's a cute guy! And he's got a real cute smile!! Well...what?? That's it!! JUST a cute smile!! Geez!! Can't I even appreciate someone's smile??
HIM
Spent most of the day working with the new girl at office. Mansi (her name), has got a BEAUTIFUL smile!!! Uhhhh, am I falling for my junior??? Shit!! No!!! She's my colleague for God's sake!! I need to get a grip on myself!!! God!!
HER
Alright, so I just realised something. In the morning everyone looks like a fresh flower petal in the morning but by the time it is evening people start resembling a papad. And when I was introduced to Aditya the day before, it was evening.
So you can imagine my surprise when he came over to my desk first thing today morning looking all cute-sy cute-sy!!! And Godddddddddddddd THAT smile!!!! *sigh* Anyway, so he was standing right in front of me - smiling. And I wondered what the heck is wrong with him. I mean, alright, it's the start of a great sunny day et al but why beam at me!?
And it was then that realisation dawned on me!!! That smile was a mere polite reciprocation of the IDIOTIC WIDE GRIN pasted on my face!!!!!!!!!!!!! Ughhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!
I have a crush on my boss!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! No!!! No!!!! Nooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!! who has a crush on their boss!!!!!!!!!
I'm doomed!!! I'm soooooooooooo doomed!!!!!!!!!!!!
HIM
I went up to her desk first thing in the morning! And I have no idea why!! And I was smiling like an idiot!! I must have looked like such a fool!!! Anyway, tried to make conversation with her too during the course of the day. Damn! I wish I had a little, okay, a LOT more experience in this. :(
HER
Okay!!! So I did some research on Aditya today. He's apparently from IIT!! *impressed* And he is an under 19 TT champ!! And he sings!!!! (OMG!!!!) And plays the keyboard too!!!!!!!!!!!! And he is a great photographer as well!!!!
*sighhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh*
*wants to stay in my dream world where he sings, I dance, he photgraphs, I model.*
Oh shit!! He's real cool....would he be single??? and even if he is, why in the world will he like me???? Gosh!! Why didn't I think of this earlier???
HIM
So I got to know a little about Mansi from another colleague - a friend of hers!!! She writes!!! How cool is that!! And her favourite book is Fountainhead!!! And she is a state level basket ball player!! Wow!!! And she seems to have a penchant for dancing!!
I wonder if she's single....I couldn't get any info on that. I mean, who is single these days anymore? And if you're someone like her, the chances are even bleaker. :(
To be (maybe) continued......
A Reminder of Innocent Times
Author: bondgal_rulz / Labels: cricket , Innocence , Life , Observations , Random
Kshitij was confused. He normally liked to watch the sunset, he liked the pastels it generated because he knew that he would be around for the crisp new day which it would give birth to. Every sunset marked the culmination of another day in Kshitij's life but today he was looking elsewhere. He was confused because he had just finished having a conversation with his nine year old son Anmol. He had asked Anmol, quite playfully, what his ambition in life was. As a nine year old, Kshitij had expected him to come up with answers like a soldier or a pilot or any other heroic pursuit seeking to find expression within a child's mind. Kshitij remembered fondly that when he had been asked the same question , he had shouted out "Superman!" with a proud grin on his face. But Anmol's answer was different, "Investment Banker" Kshitij was surprised more than anything else. He stared at the setting sun and thought about his days as a nine year old, when dreams were utopian yet simple.
He smiled as he thought of how his late Uncle Kapoor would have been extremely surprised and maybe even a little aggrieved at Anmol's reply. Uncle Kapoor had once said "When you are five you want to be like your father, when you are ten you want to be a superhero, when you are fifteen you want to be a soldier, doctor, scientist et al. By the time you are twenty, you do not know what to do with your life and when you are forty you want to be five year old again." Uncle Kapoor was not around but his words still brought a smile on Kshitij's face.
He sighed and switched on the television. Even here his confusions were multiplied. A grim faced news-reader informed him that a certain section of the crowd had jeered at Sachin Tendulkar as he was walking back to the pavilion. He was utterly perplexed. Wasn't Tendulkar supposed to be the messiah of Indian cricket? Wasn't he supposed to be the flaming symbol of exuberant greatness? He remembered a time when he had a fist fight with one of his classmates just because the latter had said that Gavaskar was not good on the on-side. He wondered about the fickle mindedness of the people around him. Uncle Kapoor had once said, "Legends never fade away. They just reinvent themselves from time to time. You just have to wait." Yes, Uncle Kapoor still made sense.
He switched the television off and decided to check his mails. Here again his brows furrowed. He read about his cousin Ashwin who was a fourth year mechanical engineering student in 'one of those obscure colleges in Bangalore'. Ashwin had been offered a job by one of the software companies which he had readily accepted. Kshitij was surprised. What did mechanical engineering students have to do with software consultancy? How can a student who has toiled hard for four years, studying subjects like fluid mechanics, work in a software firm doing the 'donkey work' for MNCs? Uncle Kapoor had once said, "Engineers are the creators of the nation." Kshitij was not sure about the prospects of creation of a nation in Ashwin's career.
Kshitij felt thirsty. He walked to the kitchen to fetch himself a glass of water. There he found his nine year old talking to his mother animatedly about 'Rang De Basanti'. Anmol was telling his mother how nice he had felt when he heard Aamir Khan narrating 'sarfaroshi ki tamanna...' "Did Aamir Khan write those lines himself? Aamir Khan is a true national hero. First he defeats the haughty British in Lagaan, then he shoots corrupt politicians and now he comes back to show how the educational system needs to be revamped. He should be given the Bharat Ratna. What does sarfaroshi mean Mom?" asked Anmol excitedly. Kshitij just smiled and nodded his head. He remembered that as a child he had a photograph of Subash Chandra Bose on his desk. He used to have long discussions with his father about the repercussions if India had gained independence the Bose way. Back then celebrating heroics was more cerebral than today where icons are selected out of the reel life. "True heroes are those who appeal to your sense and question your sensibilities," Uncle Kapoor used to say. Kshitij sighed and thought about today's times when excuses like 15th August, 26th January or an occasional movie like "Rang De Basanti" are needed to feel patriotic.
Kshitij looked at the watch and realized that it was time to take his son for his cricket coaching at the academy. His mind instantly jogged back to his childhood cricketing days. They called themselves the "Cheerful Chums". Some of them could play and some could not; but they still had a lot of fun. They played with whichever ball they could lay their hands on. They played anywhere and over any distance. And they got together to read a book about Gary Sobers whom Uncle Kapoor called the 'greatest cricketer in the world.' ever since he had read it, Kshitij had wished that he were left handed. Now his son talks to him about his thigh pad before putting ball to bat, he puts all his gear on and does a shadow practice in front of the mirror. "Why do you need all those gloves and and pads before you learn to bat?" Uncle Kapoor would have asked. But the boy went to an academy and the coach had insisted that he buy these. He had almost been talked into buying an expensive helmet.
He returned to the sunset. At least the sun does not assume the garb of modernity. He thought about his times, the innocent times when emotions, ambitions and aspirations were real and devoid of all the mundane attributes of materialism. He thought about the times when a man could choose his dreams rather than buying them.
Kshitij switched off his sunset, called out to his son and talked to him about peaked caps, sandwiches in the canteen, shirts that puff up in the evening breeze, colours during Holi, animated conversations on the way back from school, stylized radio commentary and a lot of fun. His son asked him about television rights, cartoon network, Mc Donald's, ambush marketing, sting operations, branded shoes.....and he smiled. He looked up at the photograph of Uncle Kapoor. He too, was smiling.
1. What is your current obsession?
To lose weight!! :( :( (Though I'm not doing anything constructive towards attaining it. What?? Do you have any idea how chilly it is right now??? :|)
2. What are you wearing today?
Clothes like yesterday and the day before that and the one before that and.....
3. What’s for dinner?
Whatever it was, is in my tummy right now. :D
4. What’s the last thing you bought?
Two Orbit chewing gums.
5. What are you listening to right now?
Mom and Dad's conversation about my (supposedly)new developed lack in studies. (When it was right there throughout!!)
6. What do you think about the person who tagged you?
He seems to be a real cool guy. AND he COOKS!!! *impressed* :P
7. If you could have a house totally paid for, fully furnished anywhere in the world, where would you like it to be?
Anywhere would do fine as long as I'm close to my near and dear ones. (Though Venice/Rome/New Zealand/Scotland would be nice)
8. What are your must-have pieces for summer?
A piece of watermelon, 2 of mango, some pieces of apple and throw in a couple of pieces of cake too. :D
9. If you could go anywhere in the world for the next hour, where would you go?
Stay right where I'm in my cozy razai.
10. Which language do you want to learn?
Loads - Bengali, Marathi, Urdu, Spanish and brush up my French a bit.
11. What’s your favourite quote?
"Why do you wanna fit in when you have the ability to stand out?" (From the movie What a Girl Wants)
12. Who do you want to meet right now?
Any hot handsome hunk having a decent sized brain would do.
13. What is your favourite colour?
The colour of night, the colour of sky, the colour of blood, the colour of grass. In short - The colours of life.
14. Give us 3 styling tips that work for you.
a) Be yourself.
"Why do you wanna fit in when you have the ability to stand out?" (From the movie What a Girl Wants)
12. Who do you want to meet right now?
Any hot handsome hunk having a decent sized brain would do.
13. What is your favourite colour?
The colour of night, the colour of sky, the colour of blood, the colour of grass. In short - The colours of life.
14. Give us 3 styling tips that work for you.
a) Be yourself.
b) Be yourself.
c)Be yourself.
15. What is your dream job?
Dream job - nice oxymoron. :D
16. What’s your favourite magazine?
15. What is your dream job?
Dream job - nice oxymoron. :D
16. What’s your favourite magazine?
Don't read magazines anymore.
17. If you had $100 now, what would you spend it on?
Clothes. Duh!
18. What do you consider a fashion faux pas?
17. If you had $100 now, what would you spend it on?
Clothes. Duh!
18. What do you consider a fashion faux pas?
Red coat and yellow tie. Yeah, my taxation professor actually came to class like that once.
19. Who according to you is the most over-rated style icon?
Paris Hilton
20. What kind of haircut do you prefer?
The kind that suits me.
21. What are you going to do after this?
Watch a movie.
22. What are your favourite movies?
Go check my profile, lazy bums. :P
23. What inspires you?
Air, water, sky, birds, people, animals - LIFE inspires me.
Paris Hilton
20. What kind of haircut do you prefer?
The kind that suits me.
21. What are you going to do after this?
Watch a movie.
22. What are your favourite movies?
Go check my profile, lazy bums. :P
23. What inspires you?
Air, water, sky, birds, people, animals - LIFE inspires me.
Oh alright! Alcohol it is. Geez!
24. What do your friends call you most commonly?
Abe, oye, sali, some other stuff that I don't think I should write and yeah Isha too.
25. Would you prefer coffee or tea?
Tea.
26. What do you do when you are feeling low or terribly depressed?
Sleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep!!!!!
27. What makes you go wild?
Stupidity and obstinacy makes me go wild with anger and as for wild with happiness - I have no idea!
28. Which other blogs do you love visiting?
Whoever made this tag is certainly not very well versed with the concept of a PROFILE.
29. Favorite Dessert/Sweet?
Gulab Jamuns, laddus and of course dark chocolate (in any form), chocolate fondant.
30. How many tabs are turned on in your browser right now?
24. What do your friends call you most commonly?
Abe, oye, sali, some other stuff that I don't think I should write and yeah Isha too.
25. Would you prefer coffee or tea?
Tea.
26. What do you do when you are feeling low or terribly depressed?
Sleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep!!!!!
27. What makes you go wild?
Stupidity and obstinacy makes me go wild with anger and as for wild with happiness - I have no idea!
28. Which other blogs do you love visiting?
Whoever made this tag is certainly not very well versed with the concept of a PROFILE.
29. Favorite Dessert/Sweet?
Gulab Jamuns, laddus and of course dark chocolate (in any form), chocolate fondant.
30. How many tabs are turned on in your browser right now?
Eight.
31. Favourite Season?
31. Favourite Season?
All of them I guess.
32. If I come to your house now, what would u cook for me?
How about a nice story? ;)
33. What is the right way to avoid people who purposefully hurt you?
Hurt them harder, better and longer and voila! they will avoid you. :D
34. What are you afraid of the most?
Losing those who matter to me.
35. When you looked at yourself in the mirror today, what was the first thing you thought?
OMG!!! The pimple has vanished!!!! YIPPEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!! *jumps up and down in joy*
36. What brings a smile on your face instantly?
Good conversations, great music, genuine compliments, naughty thoughts, old pics, smiling kids - actually anyone smiling for that matter.
37. A word that you say a lot?
32. If I come to your house now, what would u cook for me?
How about a nice story? ;)
33. What is the right way to avoid people who purposefully hurt you?
Hurt them harder, better and longer and voila! they will avoid you. :D
34. What are you afraid of the most?
Losing those who matter to me.
35. When you looked at yourself in the mirror today, what was the first thing you thought?
OMG!!! The pimple has vanished!!!! YIPPEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!! *jumps up and down in joy*
36. What brings a smile on your face instantly?
Good conversations, great music, genuine compliments, naughty thoughts, old pics, smiling kids - actually anyone smiling for that matter.
37. A word that you say a lot?
Kuch bhi!
38. What was your last FB status message/Tweet?
38. What was your last FB status message/Tweet?
Memories :( *sighhhhh* :( :( :(
39. What would you do if you were made President of India for one day?
Change laws relating to commercial sexual exploitation and many other silly ones, ban the attendance requirement and make Spiltsvilla illegal.
40. Which cartoon character do you most identify with?
Goofy. And a little with Dennis at times. :)
Rules for those who are tagged:
Respond and rework – answer these questions on your blog, replace one question that you dislike with a question of your own, and add one more question to the list. Then tag eight or ten other new set of people.
Respond and rework – answer these questions on your blog, replace one question that you dislike with a question of your own, and add one more question to the list. Then tag eight or ten other new set of people.
All those who read are invited to do the tag. :)
And when all the wars are done, a butterfly will still be beautiful...
Author: bondgal_rulz / Labels: Beautiful , Fiction , Love , WarDear Diary, [Wednesday, 5/5/05]
Have you ever really seen a butterfly? I know we have all SEEN them, but how many of us have actually seen one.
I'm not a nature lover myself. In fact if truth be told, I detest nature! Things like earthworms, bugs and cockroaches do NOT fascinate me. I consider air-conditioning to be my natural atmosphere. The first time I tried to admire a tree, a bird did its morning business RIGHT on top of my head! Yeah, nature? NOT a big fan. But I was watching this documentary on T.V. on butterflies. They are so beautiful, so serene. Their different colors blend together, the symmetry of their colors is profound, a perfect example of form and function, till a gentle breeze blows and they fly up, lighter than air, into the endless horizon, in a hurry to get where, no one knows......
Dear Diary, [Wednesday, 5/5/05, a little later]
Anirban cheated on me. Actually the cheating had started long ago, but as they say, 'Ignornace is bliss.' I was brought out of my bliss when I saw him in a cosy embrace with this girl I had never seen before! I could not stop the tears from flowing, right outside a movie hall! In a public place! People like me just don't do that!! But then again, you do not expect your boy friend of three years with another girl! I thought things like that only happen in movies.
The conversation we had was a lively one. He kept looking at me, with his jaw dropping to the floor, as though I was an alien who had just landed from Mars! His silence was good, I had the opportunity to yell and scream and give him (and the people around us) more than a piece of my mind. Then I walked off in a huff and told him never to try and contact me EVER again.....
.....which of course, being a man, he did. He also told me how much he loved me and how he had made a huge mistake. I was too angry, the tears would not stop. I would think of all the times we had spent together and every happy moment when I thought he actually loved me. The pain is unbearable. It is like trying to pull your still beating heart right out of your chest....
If I did that I think Ronnie, my eight year old cousin, would love it. "Horror is big nowadays." he tells me. He also loves talking about his pet dog's diarrhoea problems in graphic detail. I wonder if I could feed him something particularly nasty (the dog, not Ronnie) and then send Anirban an early birthday present! Hmmmm.....no, I'm not in kindergarten.
I will just send him a bomb!
Dear Diary, [Friday, 7/5/05]
I was moping around the house looking like one of those 'before' photographs in those make-up advertisements when my editor called, "There is this beautiful town on the border of West Bengal and Bangladesh not known by too many people." "Great!" I had thought. When a place is 'not known by many people' it implies that it has no functional sewage disposal system. So I was hardly thrilled that he had chosen me as the photographer to accompany the journalist. Apparently there was some infiltration by refugees or something, which was causing the local people problems and was turning out into a centre for disaster. As usual our editor wanted to be the first to know. I decided to take lots of toilet paper, mosquito repellent and my camera and head out to this place. At least I will have company. And I need to forget about this place for a while. Everything reminds me of Anirban and if I cry any more, the swelling of my eyes will refuse to subside and Ronnie keeps talking about the lead role in his horror movie! Seriously, what are they feeding kids these days?
Dear Diary, [Saturday, 8/5/05]
It is horrible, just horrible. The brutality of man. The refugee situation is way bigger than anyone told us. And this town is worst hit. The locals of nearby villages have taken matters into their own hands. They are killing people left right and centre without caring about nationality. And what for? This town has no electricity, no running water. If you ask me there should be a problem of people trying to get out, not in. The people are in a pitiable state. What is happening?
Dear Diary, [Monday, 10/5/05]
The past few days have been hell. Last night news of further refugee infiltration reached us. The army arrived today with a single battalion and has surrounded the area. They want to control the situation, they say. The commander has a huge moustache. I have to use a wider frame lens to accomodate it. He keeps talking about how he would kill a refugee on sight, how they are all spies for Pakistan. I asked him how much toilet paper he had brought. I think I will be the first to go, before the refugees.
Diary,
I do not know what day it is. Things have been continuing at a hectic pace. People keep moving around and gunfire and shouting occur at regular intervals. I am stuck in the guest house as I am not allowed to leave it. The journalist had gone out in the morning and has not returned yet. I don't know what to do, I'm very scared. Mr. Long Moustache has disappeared. He no longer comes to give me updates.
Diary,
I am lying on a hospital bed in the government hospital of the nearest town. The last thing that I remember is that there was a loud, persistent banging on the door of the guest house and then the people with torches and knives came bursting in. After that I do not remember much. I have major stitches and my left arm and leg is in a cast. The doctor does not tell me much. My family is here. My mother keeps crying. Everything is very hazy, I think I am on some powerful painkillers. even Ronnie is crying an he watches horror movies. I guess I must look really bad. I keep drifting in and out of consciousness, so days are hard to figure out. Anirban is not here.
Diary,
The doctor told my parents that I could be moved back home. He was speaking to them in a low voice, I could not hear much. My mom seems to have taken up crying as a full time vocation. My medication seems to have been increased. I cannot feel the pen I'm writing with. I was looking outside the window just now and saw the most wonderful thing. A beautiful, purple butterfly flew in with the wind. It had purple and dark blue and red colors on its wings. It flew around the room and went out again. It is time to go home. I wonder if it will come back.
So I've been tagged, by Netika. And it's a tough one, for me at least. Talking is the love of my life and what better than to talk about myself! So there is hardly anything that people don't know about me. But the sweet heart that she is, I just had to oblige her. :) So here goes my attempt.
1. For the first 19 years of my life I wished I was a guy. It was only after being surrounded by some angels in college that I realized the worth of being born a girl. :)
2. My nose flares up every time I lie or try to hide something. Though I've controlled it to a large extent, it still leads to awkward situations at times. (OMG!!! I don't believe I have actually given this out on my blog!!!)
3. I HATE flowers!! I mean they are so cheesy, cliched, regular, irritating and wasteful!! The amount of land that is wasted on cultivating them can be better utilised for agricultural purposes and feed billions of empty stomachs. But no, what will people then decorate their dining tables with??
And they are so ephemeral!! How can they ever be a symbol of love?? One night stand, maybe, but love???
4. I have never had a bone broken, got stitches or been operated on. Good thing, I guess?! *shrugs*
5.I can write in three distinct hand writings.
6. My solution to all problems is SLEEP. Fight with parents, friends - sleep. Tension during exams - sleep. (Only for 15 minutes but) Feeling low - sleep. Try it out, it works!!
7. I fall in love with Hrithik Roshan every time I see him dancing in Dhoom 2 or with John Cusack every time I see Serendipity or with Brad Pitt when.....you get the drift, don't you? ;)
And I'll tag Annie, Iddy Albatross, Weirdo Guy, Rhythm, Divsi, Mahesh, Americanising Desi, Dr. Acula.
As I'm writing this post on the very last day of 2009, trying to analyse whether this has been a good or bad year, all I can say is that it has been a tough year. Fulfulling in some ways and not so fulfilling in many more ways. Humans are not an easy species to be satisfied you see.
I clearly remember last year's new year's eve.....I was out partying till the wee hours of the morning....surrounded with my best pals....and some not so best pals...it was a long and hard night...one I'd really like to erase from my mind permanently....
Did lots of things for the first time, regretted doing some of them, can't wait to do some again and again, made new friends, lost some real good ones, got placed (yes! I finally managed to get through 2 days of interviews WITHOUT any horrendous stupidity), explored my city, explored another city which had been beckoning me since I don't know when (details are for another post), fought with my closest pals only to come back and form an even closer bond, applied nail paint for the first time!! (sea green!!!), survived heartbreak, prescribed for depression, came out of it, had the most fabulous internship ever, bus aur yaad nahi aa raha!! lol.
Hmmmmm, not a bad year all in all....but I'm glad that it's time for me to bid goodbye to 2009.
So alvida 2009 and welcome 2010! :)
Wish all of you a very very prosperous and fulfilling new year!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!
Author: bondgal_rulz / Labels: Birthday
HAPPPPYYY HAAPPPYYY HAAAAAAPPPPPPYYYYY BIRTHDAY TO YOU, Annie !!!!!
May God fulfill all your wishes and bless you with everything that you have ever dreamt, desired or thought of. :)
Hope you have a super duper day tomorrow AND an even super duper year ahead. Cos you sweetheart, DESERVE it. :)
"The past three years have been a blur. For all I know the time spent at college was but a rapturous moment filled with euphoria that was too good to last..." With these closing words of the farewell speech by a final year student, the hall exploded into applause. There were smiles and there were tears, of joy I hope!
For I would definitely have shed tears at these oft-repeated words by every outgoing batch. Forget the emotional moment and you can actually laugh out loud at these cliches that have percolated through years of public disapproval of the moment of separation from the college.
Consider this: "Words cannot express the hollow feeling that is plaguing my heart right now." Can't they? Then how do you intend to deliver the rest of your speech? Through a mime, maybe!
"It seems that it was only yesterday that I was seated amongst the audience, listening to the inspiring Orientation Speech by the Director."
There! The genius has just demonstrated the hitherto unproved theories of Time-Contraction and Time-wrapping. Take that Einstein!
"Thank you, dear teachers, for having guided us throughout the our management education. It was under your able guidance that we hatchlings developed our wings and are now ready to take flight into a world of endless possibilities." Bravo! Nothing wrong with that except for the fact that you can actually notice the unbelieving smirk on the speaker's face for having pulled off saying something that incredulous.
Imagine a flock of chirping birds escaping from a cage, year after year, celebrating freedom after two years. Add to that the immense possibility of their spraying droppings on those left behind. The above platitudes don't seem quite so believable, do they?
Come to think of it, it is not only at farewell speeches that we come across such repetitions. Placement interviews, for one, are another cliche heaven.
Preparation for interviews heavily involves mugging up smart and impressive (and now decaying!) answers that have been doled out innumerable job - seekers for years. Needless to say, these answers have become the contents of a placement formula. Notice the subtle humour attached with renditions of these cliches in the interview room-
Question: So, tell me something about yourself.
Smart Answer: (after a formal introduction stating name and place of living) I am an ambitious, hard-working person. Quick grasping power accentuates my cognitive skills. I am a good team worker and believe in developing innovative solutions. Besides, I can assimilate myself comfortably into any work environment and can work amicably with fellow workers.
Spare a thought for the poor interviewer who has now interviewed the thousandth person exhibiting the same set of 'cognitive skills', 'team spirit' and 'hard-working' capabilities. This truly is an "Attack of the Clones".
Question: Why do want to join this particular company?
The same stinking answer (The plastic smile still intact): The company has an unparalleled market reputation. It provides ample growth opportunities to individuals. I, as a persevering professional, found the work ethics of the company quite alluring.
Money, to me, is but a reward for doing good work and nothing more. A decent salary obviously gives you a high.
Washing your hands off the "filthy lucre", eh? Wait till you see this intellectually motivated professional brag about the anticipated fat pay-packet in front of his drunken cronies. Well, at least he was honest about money giving you a 'high'!
Question: Who is your idol in life?
The answer to this much anticipated question: My mother/father.
Aha! Now the candidate can almost clearly hear his management coaching teacher hollering away, "Choose your father or mother. They can't screw you dimwits with questions pertaining to those two people at least!"
But can you blame these individuals for resorting to such a blatant show of this lack of creativity? Hell! Our day to day life involves cliches of the worst degree.
How many times have we heard friends sympathising with you, "Chuck it man! No point crying over spilt milk."
For God's sake, leave the poor milk alone. Wonder who that jobless man was who dedicated all his cunning to create this proverb about this mundane event of spilling milk!
Ever reached the class late? Panting and puffing (literally) when you reach the class at last, you are sure to be greeted with these famous words, "You are too early for the next class!" Apart from the murderous feeling that arises in your heart at that instant, you rue this lame attempt by the teacher to show off his smartness (at something at least!) If the gurus themselves cannot come up with a new catch line for something as simple as throwing an unpunctual brat out of the class, how can the students be expected to break with such cliched conversational routines?
All said and done, we can finally conclude that cliches are an inseparable but indistinguishable part of our lives. They claim their position in any dialogue with panache. To say that we need a language revolution would be too far-fetched an idea. But guys, is using a little bit of creativity that difficult?
"Begone rascals", screamed the old man. He was always there, seated at one end of the park bench, his hands on top of his walking stick, his eyes downcast. There was a little boy there too, seated at the other end. I was a regular at that park and everyday before dusk I would go for a refreshing jog around the park and everyday I would see the old man and the little boy and everyday they would be seated on the same bench. They seemed to be in a world of their own.
While children his age spent their time playing games, running around or just rolling on the grass, the little boy would just sit there, his hands coupled between his legs, a cap on his tiny head, shielding his eyes. A collapsible wheelchair rested against his side of the bench. The old man would often mutter something to himself, shove his hands into his pocket, take out some bird seeds and scatter them among the pigeons.
On this particular day, I went jogging again and as I passed the park bench, I saw the old man brandishing his cane at some children who seemed to be teasing him. "Begone rascals", he screamed again.
I could not bear the sight of the old man being harassed. I ran towards the park bench and drove the children away. The old man was quivering and gulping down mouthfuls of air. Placing a comforting hand on his shoulders, I steadied him. "Take it easy" I said, "you will be fine". He looked up at me full of gratitude. "Thank you sir." A wheeze burst forth from his cracked lips. The wrinkles on his old face seemed to deepen as he gave me a warm smile. He must have been in his seventies. "When I was young, I never did things like these....the world's gone to the dogs!"
He suddenly offered me his hand. "How stupid of me. Let me introduce myself. I'm Alexander Malkovich." I introduced myself and within a few minutes I was sitting beside him and we were chatting like we had known each other for ages. "I had a daughter, Jane", he said, trying hard to remember. "She was a good child. Extremely beautiful. But she fell in love with this army fellow. He said he was going to marry her. I warned her against it, but she wouldn't listen. She was too much in love with him. So I consented and my worst fears came true."
Malkovich looked like he was going to break down any minute. Gathering himself, he continued. "He left her with a child and ran away a week before marriage." "Jane refused to get an abortion done. Now no one would even look at her, let alone marry her. She died during labor, giving birth to Peter. Maybe it was better for her, she didn't have to suffer anymore. Strange are the ways of our Lord."
I wanted to console him, but he continued. "Peter was the apple of my eye. But he too was cursed. He began to develop fits...I took him to many a doctor, but no one could cure him completely."
"Peter loved to come here....he would sit for hours on this park bench feeding the pigeons. I knew he didn't have long to live, so I stopped his schooling and brought him here everyday. I wanted him to enjoy what little time he had, to the fullest".
It was getting dark and the air was much cooler now. Malkovich suddenly went over to the boy and adjusted the woollen shawl around the boy's neck. "You'll catch a cold if you're not careful", he said to the boy and came back. The little boy must have been asleep for he never moved an inch.
"Where was I...yes, Peter was doomed to die". Twilight was giving way to night. People were leaving the park and it was almost empty of people. Hardly anyone stayed this late because of the muggings. the night wind was building up. The place had an eerie resemblance to a horror movie I has watched the previous night.
"And one day, Peter and I went swimming; he developed convulsions and drowned. I tried to save him, I tried so hard, but I couldn't, I couldn't. I just couldn't".
Malkovich was sobbing now. I gave him my handkerchief. "don't be so hard on yourself", I said. "It wasn't your fault".
Malkovich looked at me, his blue eyes seemed to stare straight into my soul. "I loved Peter very much. I could not bear to be separated from him. I could not." The sky now had an indigo tint. The park lamps had a heavenly halo around their heads. I sat there perplexed and dumbfounded. Malkovich's eyes were red and he was trying hard not to cry again. He got up. "Well, it was nice to have made your acquaintance, but I must be on my way". He took a card from his pocket. "Here's my card. If you need my services, I would be glad to help. Goodnight sir".
I tried to speak, but my voice had betrayed me. The cool night wind blew the cap off the boy's head. His eyes appeared glassy in the ghostly lights of the lamps. Malkovich picked up the cap and placed it on the boy's head. He then unfolded the wheel chair and lifted the boy onto it.
"Come on Peter. It's time to go home". As they slowly disappeared down the path, I looked at the card. It read:
ALEXANDER MALKOVICH
TAXIDERMIST
"WE STUFF ANYTHING"
The wind blew the card from my paralysed fingers. I never went to that park again
Comfortably Dumb
Author: bondgal_rulz / Labels: Dumb dumber and I , Funny , Introspection , Random , TAGGED
I read this on Sowmi's blog and immediately knew that I had to take it up.
The number of X's is directly proportional to the level of my dumbness. Read on. :)
[X] Gum has fallen out of your mouth when you were talking. (Looks away)
[X] Gum has fallen out of your mouth when you were NOT talking. (Looks away, whistling and trying to look for a place to hide herself!)
[X] You have ran into a glass/screen door. (Haven't YOU???)
[X] You have jumped out of a moving vehicle. (Ever travelled in Delhi's blue-line buses?)
[X] You have thought of something funny while walking by yourself. (This has got me into trouble sooo many times, that it's not even funny anymore!!)
[X] Laughed, then watched people give you weird looks. (Yes yes, and it does not end there. Usually I give them an even weirder look and then continue with my Ravan-kind laughter. :D)
Alright, first set of questions completed, and all have been crossed. Maybe this tag wasn't such a good idea after all...
[X] You have run into a tree/bush. (This is really belittling my dumbness. I have ran into a solid wall for God's sake. And that too with a car!!)
[ ] You know that it IS possible to lick your elbow.
[X] You have tried to lick your elbow… a few times. (Once, when I first read this tag. :D)
[X] You never knew that the Alphabet and Twinkle Twinkle Little star have the same rhythm.
[ ]You just tried to sing them. [Ha! I did not! (I already did when i read it for the first time. ;) And God!! They actually DO rhyme!!)]
[X] You have tripped on your shoelace and fallen.
[ ] You have choked on your own spit. (Ewww!! No!!!)
[ ] You have seen the Matrix and still don’t get it. (Proudly smiles at not crossing this one.) :)
[ ] You’ve never seen the Matrix. (Smug face)
[X] You type only with two fingers. (Smug face disappears) :(
[ ]You have accidentally caught something on fire. (Accidentally, no. Deliberately, yes. Wait, does that make me even dumber??) *worried*
[ ] You tried to drink out of a straw, but it went into your nose/eyes. (Lol!! No!! BUT, I'll tell you what happened at Pizza Hut the other day. I was drinking outta a straw and the lemonade just didn't come into my mouth!! I sucked at the liquid at least half a dozen times before realising that it was broken in between!!) (This is a "dumb" tag, I can tell stories which are not very funny OR relevant wherever and whenever I want too. :)
[X] You have caught yourself drooling. (Better than letting myself drool all over right? A better question would have been - You've NOT caught yourself drooling. Or has someone else caught you drooling.)
[ ] You have fallen asleep in class and fell outta your chair. (Fallen asleep - yes. Fell outta my chair- yes again. But BOTH simultaneously - Hell no!!)
[ ] Sometimes you just stop thinking. (Sometimes, I just START thinking.) ;)
[X] You are telling a story and forget what you were talking about.
[X] People often shake their heads and walk away from you. (Does people include Moms too?? Come on man!! They are moms!!! They are SUPPOSED to be like that!!)
[X] You are often told to use your “inside voice”.
[ ] You use your fingers to do simple math.
[ ] You have eaten a bug. (Vegetarian)
[X] You are taking this test when you should be doing something more important. (duh!)
[X] You have put your clothes on backwards or inside out, and didn’t realize it.
[X] You’ve looked all over for something and realized it was in your hand. (This is a proven sign of geniusness btw.)
[ ] You have ran around naked in your house.
[ ] You re post bulletins because you are scared that what they say will happen to you if you don’t.
[X] You break a lot of things.
[ ] Your friends know not to use big words around you.
[ ] You tilt your head when you’re confused. (Not that I do, but just how in the world is that supposed to make you dumb???)
[ ] You have fallen out of your chair before. (Before what? Please clarify.)
[ ] When you’re lying in bed, you try to find pictures in the texture of the ceiling or wall.
[ ] The word “ummmmm” is used many times a day.
19 "X" marks out of a total of 37!!!! What????? I'm only 51.35% dumb!!!!! Yippee!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! That's NOT SO bad!! Is it??? Alright, may be it is, but at least knowing it makes me a lil less dumb, nahi? :) :D
I'm not tagging anyone specifically as hardly anyone obliges. Hmmpphhh. All those who want to test their level of dumbness/intelligence, consider yourself tagged. :)
God has a strange way of fulfilling wishes. I had wanted to post something very badly today and had even started on it but lost the enthu to complete it mid-way. And around half an hour back, a friend asked if I would put up something that he has written, on my blog; since he, for reasons best known to him has deleted his own wonderful blog - Technicolor Collage. Many of you already know him (we have even co-authored a story) and for those who haven't had the pleasure to read him - guys you have really missed out on some outstanding work. Arnab Majumdar has been both a friend and an inspiration in ways that I now cannot count.
My blog is honoured to be adorned by a post written by him and so am I. :)
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I’ve heard a lot of people say that there’s no place like home. I wonder if that’s true or not. For me, I don’t think it holds true anymore. You see, a home for me is more than the brick and mortar structure, the walls within which you live. A home is a place where you feel safe, comfortable; a place where you have memories that make you smile and cry, sometimes at the same time. A place that’s familiar, and yet you can’t get enough of it. My home wasn’t restricted to my house. My home was the city that I love, the place where I felt free.
It seems to me that the more I want to define my home, the harder it gets. I start with my house, but my home wouldn’t stop there. The park in front of my house, that’s always flaunting the lush green dew-soaked grass early in the mornings, the roads where I’d go for walks to cool off when I was angry, the uphill and downhill roads, the ones that got built on the last range of the Aravalis, they say. The park in the other colonies, the other blocks, where I’d spent so much of my time. See how my home never seems to be restricted by walls?
I went for a walk today. A real walk, something I haven’t done for in a long time now. I kept walking without thinking, and somehow, I walked to almost all the places that I’ve ever considered to be my home. I got out of the house, and somehow, I was reminded of the time when I was learning how to ride a bike. It was my friend’s bike, a brilliant blue one. I’d give the pedal a mighty push, roll off for a few centimeters, and then invariably fall down on the asphalt. I had the scars of those days for a real long time.
There’s a place near my house, which goes by the name of Pocket 52. There’s also another such Pocket in Chittaranjan Park (it’s a colony in New Delhi, that’s where I live), called Pocket 40. I’ve always wondered whatever happened to all those pockets in between. I’ve looked for them too, but never found any of them…
This Pocket 52 is a block (or a pocket, whatever you want to call it) which is located on a small hilly area. This means, that the roads running through this Pocket are quite steep. Once I got to learn how to ride the bike, it was here that I used to come most often, to hone my skills at. My friend – the one with that Brilliant Blue Bike, and I, would climb to the top of a road that went downhill, and push off, hard. The road was so steep that pedaling was never required. The wind would rush into our faces, push back our hair. The speed of the bike would invariably make our stomachs clench a little bit, and those 6 seconds of the downhill ride were enough to make us smile for the next 5 minutes we took to ride back home.
Just behind this small hill, there’s a bright green gate that marks the end of Chittaranjan Park, and the beginning of Greater Kailash II. When we’d grown up a little, and reached an age when riding a bike (specially red, blue or green ones) was considered kids’ stuff, my friend moved for a few years from C. R. Park to G. K. II. It was a strange time for me. This guy lived just four houses away from me before, so there had never been the need to call him up. I’d just have to go stand in the middle of the road, holler his name, and he’d be there. I didn’t even have his phone number, never bothered to take it. One fine day, I reach home, and I see a big metal board on his house which proclaimed that the residents had moved. There was an address and a phone number given, but it wasn’t of a residence. All mails to that house were being directed to their office, and that’s someplace where I couldn’t really go to meet my old friend.
During Durga Puja that year, which is a big thing at C.R. Park, I met this guy again. It was almost a month since we hadn’t met each other, so I was very happy to see him. He’d gotten his car with him that day, and we drove over to his house immediately. I was surprised to see him driving along the same roads that we’d ridden our bikes all our childhood, and couldn’t help but smile out loud at those memories. We moved beyond the bright green gate, along the new park that was inside my old friend’s new neighborhood, and finally reached his home. It was a very simple house, and there’ve been a lot of memories there too… but that place belongs to another family now, and I couldn’t visit it today during the walk. All I could do was stand there, at the gate, and remember the many hours I’d spent in his room, and the tiny balcony that I could see from the road below.
I walked slowly back to the park that used to be a place for us to escape to during the years he stayed at G.K. II. There were a few things there that still are etched in my memories. A bench made out of solid rock, a small wooden bridge that seems completely unnecessary at one end of the park, a set of four green benches facing each other. Nighttime in that park used to be jet black, but that’s changed now. They have halogen lamps there now, so the rock-bench, the little wooden bridge, the four green benches facing each other – they all glow white, all night. The rock felt cool, and I sat there quite a while. A few years back, whenever I’d go there, I used to gaze at stars, my mind in autopilot mode. I couldn’t see the stars today; the glare from the halogen lamps all around me was too bright.
In 1997, I had broken my collar bone. That time, apparently, C.R. Park didn’t have many good orthopedic doctors, so the guy with the big x-ray machine had sent me to the Birla Mandir, located near that old park. It was a tough time for me that time, as it would hurt my collar bone to do even the simplest things, like lying down or getting up. Every time I used to go to see that doctor, he’d have to change the crepe bandage around the collar bone, which hurt like crazy. And every time, just to cheer me up, Ma would buy me a big bag of Lay’s chips, which had those Tazo things in them. I ended up with a big collection, but finally I gave it all away. The shop where I’d buy the packs of chips was a tiny, dilapidated little brick room that time. It’s one of the few things of G.K. II that’s still the same way. The shop still stands proudly, with the big bags of chips in all colors hanging around the shutter. The only thing that’s changed about that place in all these years is that in place of a 100 watt Bajaj bulb, the owner uses a Havell’s CFL now.
I had been walking for quite a while in G.K. II, and somehow felt the need to return to my colony. The boundaries of my home can be quite dynamic as well, depending on my mood. I entered C.R. Park, and was greeted with the Kali Mandir. I’m not a very religious guy, but this is one place where our little group of friends has spent many evenings. Chatting about the most mundane things to discussing the most serious of issues, this Mandir has always given us a wonderful place to calm down during even the most frustrating of times. Today, being Bijoya Doshomi – the last day of Durga Pujo, the place was crowded. I couldn’t go in. Rather I didn’t want to go in; too many people, far too many familiar faces.
I walked on. After the Mondir, the blocks of C.R. Park continued. The I-Block Park used to be another one of our favorite hangout spots. It used to be one of the most well maintained parks in C.R. Park. With a badminton court, it used to be one place that drew us there almost every evening, till our own block park got badminton courts, that is. Still, there have been a whole lot of memories that followed me while I walked around that park, so much so, that even though I was getting late for home, I couldn’t stop myself from walking inside. Beside the two dark badminton courts stands a big tree, under whose shade we used to sit, after my friend would beat me at the game – every single time! I’ve known this guy for the last 13 years now, and I can literally count the number of games that I’ve won against him on my fingertips. I have absolutely no clue how he manages it, even now.
Sitting under the cool shade of that tree, I got reminded of one winter evening when we had nothing to do. There were three of us – my friend, his girlfriend of that time, and me. We were sitting, again under that big tree, just wondering what we could do to make life a little more interesting, when my friend’s girlfriend had a brainwave – Aankh Micholi on a dark, winter night! It was a long time since I’d played it, and it felt amazing to be a kid again. When my turn came to be the “denner”, I’d twisted my ankle. Tonight, I tried running through the grass like that night. This time, I cut my feet instead.
I explored my home one last time before I leave it tomorrow. I’m going back to Greater Noida, and although I know I’ll miss Home, things have changed. My friends have changed a lot, bit by bit, over the years. Now, little by little, the older things are fast fading away, and although I love this home a lot, I can’t stand to watch it become what it is turning into. I thought little things like this mattered to all the people around me, but somewhere, I was wrong. They’ve moved on from those memories, and I have to move on too. Still, it’s not easy to make a home just a house, once it’s become a home. Especially, a wonderful home like this was, with a family of friends that I chose.
Armed with her CV - the most potent weapon she possessed - she entered the room which promised her a world of opportunities. Looking into the eyes of the interviewer's eyes, she tackled all the questions brilliantly. And then it happened.
"So what did you gain from your summer internship?"
"A lot of weight."
Ooooooooooooooopssssssssss!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
MORAL: Think before you speak.
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Yeah I know this 55F kinda sucks, but I hadn't written anything for quite sometime. So when I finally did (in a bore to death seminar), I decided to put it up here. Sharmana mat, bindaas besti karna. :P :D
As for the title, well, actually this was a dream (nightmare) that I had. :D :D The Placement season in my college begins this monday, pray that I don't do any such goof-ups in any of my interviews. :)
( A dark, dingy room. The curtains are drawn. She sits on the desk in one corner, pen in hand. There is a certain repose in her motion, in her language. Paper strewn all over the floor. The bin in the other corner is overflowing. She begins to write.)
ATTEMPT I
SHE: This one is for me. This is my final expression bereaved of brevity yet not excruciatingly elaborate. I struggle to tread middle ground. I shield my face against the warmth of the golden rays, the sparrows serenading my being, the azure sky infinite yet in my outstretched arms, the foliage brilliant in its hue, the verdant landscape thus. In spite of me, it puts a smile on my face, a twinkle in my eyes. I look into the stream, hopes mellow and thoughts benign are reflected.
If only I could shield myself against the atrocities of my lot, the phantom of my dreams shattered, deafening me with that stilled silence, the void infinite yet so tangible in my outstretched arms, the insecurities magnificent in their hue, the broken spirit thus. In spite of me I clutch the pen and start writing my final expression...bereaved of brevity yet not excruciatingly elaborate.
Who am I kidding? When did I ever tread middle ground?
(She crumples the paper into a ball, aims for the bin......and misses. an exasperated ejaculation.)
ATTEMPT II
SHE: This one is for you. It is ironic when the reason to live gets engaged in the excuse to not. You wage a war against yourself to triumph over your incoherence, you claw at that elusive lucidity and meet with failure. So final, so motionless. Yet in my confusion, I found a purpose. You. I found a purpose to breathe, to infuse into your very being my life, my urgency. To caress your hopes, to nurture your love, to possess your anxieties, your apprehensions and trample over them, to hold your fears in my arms and hurl them into oblivion. I strive to be one body, one soul, one unified equation challenging the very fundamentals of this frenzy surrounding you and me, and it is a chimerical concoction,a blow so hard it leaves me breathless.
Leaves me breathless.
(This one she doesn't crumple. She reads it, re-reads it. A solitary tear starts to trickle down her cheek, hanging suspended from her chin for a moment too long. She wipes it away with a latent, passive ire.)
ATTEMPT III
SHE: This one is for everyone who loved me sometime, somewhere.
If I am accountable, if I'm responsible for leaving you with memories and nothing more, for permeating your life, establishing bonds and then fleeing in such haste, for the insidious effect of the hatred generated in you due to this decision of mine......I apologise in earnest. If I have any claims I urge you to abnegate those memories, to renounce those fragile bonds, to abdicate the domain of wrath, of negatives......I urge you in earnest.
Because I loved you not long, not enough, not forever.
But you can love me long, love me enough, love me forever.....
(She burrows her head in her arms, seeking solace from the intimacy of her own body. she lifts her head, stares unblinkingly at the photograph of her family on the table, picks the paper up without looking away and tears it to shreds.)
ATTEMPT IV
To whomsoever it may concern.
I am ending my life, no one is to be held responsible.
I am ending my life, no one is to be held responsible.
God bless.
(An inadvertent smile escapes her lips. she embraces the heavy air hanging all around her and quotes Oscar Wilde out loud, "Simple pleasures are but the last refuge of the complicated.")
The last refuge.
The End.
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