A perfect day. Music concert, dinner, long drive and now sitting under the starry sky. He looked at her and realised how she had made his life meaningful. "You've got beautiful eyes.", he whispered. With just a hint of a tear in her left eye, she said, "I wish I had seen them too."
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29 comments :
Ouch..Well written though..
I wish it really was a perfect day.
Me too.
Thanks. :)
Cheers
Wow... that had some punch in it! Great one...
Thank you so much. :)
Cool .... Good to know you a real Bonhomie time .........
Thanks. :)
Welcome to C'est La Vie. Thanks for visiting and commenting. :)
Hope to see you around.
Cheers
omg .. tht brought a shiver of overwhelming emotions.. your words bring magic. beautiful.
Glad to know it had that kind of effect.
Thank you sooooo much for the lovely comment. Your comment created magic for me too. :)
Cheers
Exactly 55 words, check out mine.
Beautifully written :)
i have serious admiration for people who write 55 fiction.. its not easy to express in less words but then u did it!
its beautiful
ahhhh...tht means u hv started gving shocks tooo...
perfect words..
Omg..profound! :)
Cool.
@ Careless Thinker, there were 67 initially. Had a hard time reducing them to 55.
Will comply. :)
Cheers
@ Dhanya...thanks a ton.
Keep visiting. :)
Cheers
@ Phoenix....It is kinda challenging which is what makes it all the more fun.
Thanks. :)
Cheers
@ Pallav...well giving shocks is a norm for me in reality, so thought why not bring that element in my writing as well.
Thank you so much. :)
Cheers
@ Siya...thank you so much. :)
Give it a try sometime. :)
Cheers
small and yet perfectly stomach knotting!
That was the idea. :)
Thanks for visiting and commenting. :)
Cheers
Hmmm...Noor ko kya pata noor hota kya hai...jab khud chand ko uski chandgi ki khabar nahi...
well did that make any sense..? :p
pata nahi
achchi kahani thi..
wish it wud have been a little longer :D
Beautiful lines there Mahesh.
Sense, is such an over rated concept, I tell you. :P
And well it was a 55 Fiction, the idea being to convey what you want to, in 55 words or less!
Glad that you liked it. :)
Cheers
Touched a chord.
Honestly though, I have read similar ones. :)
Keep 'em coming.
Peace.
You have ?
And yet it touched a chord ? Hmm, that's something....
Anyway, thanks. :)
Cheers
why did u stick to 55???? :O
well...her retort was so chweett :)
@ The Geekie - Sweet??? :O
It was supposed to be ironical, sad and melancholic!! Anything BUT sweet!! :O
And yet again I fail as a writer!!
:( ;)
Cheers
oopss
mera comment fiction bangaya
dekha
tumhari blog kya maya banadaya
:D
arey ur writing rocks
btw why 55?????
Hmmm...he he...thanks a ton mate :)
Well, dhyan se dekho tto I have written only three 55 fictions so far...rest is an assortment of fiction, poetry and random ramblings. :)
And as for why I chose to write 55 fiction...well, it was somewhat of a challenge for me to express what I wanted to in such less words. Hence, 55 fiction. :)
Cheers
:)
axed. good one.
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Bolo bolo....jee khol ke bolo :D