It's not easy being in a long distance relationship.
Long distance relationships are doomed to fail the test of time.
It's impossible to bridge the physical gap.
These are the most common things I heard from friends and family when I volunteered to share my new boyfriend's - who was based out of a different city than mine - details. So, cautious of the ill-fate that my LDR may meet and armed with all the advice and suggestions from the said parties I started seeing this guy.
We had a whirl of a time discovering each other, the place each of us called home, the different lingo we had for the same things, falling off to sleep while listening to the other's voice on phone, learning what a boon Skype was for people like us. Until it all ended. And physical gap was one of the last things to be blamed.
Yes, long distance relationships can be tough. But aren't all relationships tough by default? I constantly find myself working hard to maintain harmonious relations with my folks, friends, and colleagues. So why single out this?
Truth be told, I loved every bit of this so-called tough-to-maintain-relationship. And here's why:
1. NO PRESSURE TO LOOK DROP DEAD GORGEOUS 24X7
Not that I'm some Prom Queen, but being a girl there usually is an expectation to look good each and every time you meet the object of your affection. And more so in the initial phase of the relationship, when both of you are testing the waters. Not anymore! I could have all my phone dates with unkempt hair, chipped nails, and in pajamas! And Skype too - as the amazing camera quality can barely capture the difference between a Barbie and a poorly-aging-Britney.
2. STRAIGHT TO THE BUSINESS
Seeing each other after long gaps, you'd be so eager to catch up that you would rarely bother with the small talk. And more often than not, with the pressure of the clock ticking away, you'll be getting under the sheets at the first opportunity that comes along. Time would never feel so precious.
3. PLAY TOURIST
You get to discover all about a new place - and not just the touristy things. You get to really see the city from the perspective of someone who calls it home, who is aware of all the magic that the city offers and also all the grimy details it hides. The entire tour guide and tourist role play also offers a set-up for interesting dates.
4. FREE-ED UP WEEKENDS
Ever wondered how our girl friends usually know that there's a new guy in our life without us even telling them? That's because we usually cut them off / drastically reduce time spent with them each time this happens. We promise ourselves that we wouldn't do it the next time onwards and yet....But with your boyfriend safely tucked away in another part of the world, you still have all the weekends to yourself for partying and shopping with girl friends, going for family outings, and catching up with life in general.
5. MAGICAL REALISM
Even the most routine of things - like making tea in the kitchen, watching a movie on the laptop sitting next to each other - become nothing short of magical. Sharing a meal together is as exciting as going on a ride in an amusement park. Just being able to touch their face and smell their fragrance....breathe the same air as them...would become the stuff of your dreams.
Long distance relationships are doomed to fail the test of time.
It's impossible to bridge the physical gap.
These are the most common things I heard from friends and family when I volunteered to share my new boyfriend's - who was based out of a different city than mine - details. So, cautious of the ill-fate that my LDR may meet and armed with all the advice and suggestions from the said parties I started seeing this guy.
We had a whirl of a time discovering each other, the place each of us called home, the different lingo we had for the same things, falling off to sleep while listening to the other's voice on phone, learning what a boon Skype was for people like us. Until it all ended. And physical gap was one of the last things to be blamed.
Yes, long distance relationships can be tough. But aren't all relationships tough by default? I constantly find myself working hard to maintain harmonious relations with my folks, friends, and colleagues. So why single out this?
Truth be told, I loved every bit of this so-called tough-to-maintain-relationship. And here's why:
1. NO PRESSURE TO LOOK DROP DEAD GORGEOUS 24X7
Not that I'm some Prom Queen, but being a girl there usually is an expectation to look good each and every time you meet the object of your affection. And more so in the initial phase of the relationship, when both of you are testing the waters. Not anymore! I could have all my phone dates with unkempt hair, chipped nails, and in pajamas! And Skype too - as the amazing camera quality can barely capture the difference between a Barbie and a poorly-aging-Britney.
2. STRAIGHT TO THE BUSINESS
Seeing each other after long gaps, you'd be so eager to catch up that you would rarely bother with the small talk. And more often than not, with the pressure of the clock ticking away, you'll be getting under the sheets at the first opportunity that comes along. Time would never feel so precious.
3. PLAY TOURIST
You get to discover all about a new place - and not just the touristy things. You get to really see the city from the perspective of someone who calls it home, who is aware of all the magic that the city offers and also all the grimy details it hides. The entire tour guide and tourist role play also offers a set-up for interesting dates.
4. FREE-ED UP WEEKENDS
Ever wondered how our girl friends usually know that there's a new guy in our life without us even telling them? That's because we usually cut them off / drastically reduce time spent with them each time this happens. We promise ourselves that we wouldn't do it the next time onwards and yet....But with your boyfriend safely tucked away in another part of the world, you still have all the weekends to yourself for partying and shopping with girl friends, going for family outings, and catching up with life in general.
5. MAGICAL REALISM
Even the most routine of things - like making tea in the kitchen, watching a movie on the laptop sitting next to each other - become nothing short of magical. Sharing a meal together is as exciting as going on a ride in an amusement park. Just being able to touch their face and smell their fragrance....breathe the same air as them...would become the stuff of your dreams.
1 comments :
Excellent points, you make! I was recently telling a friend, who has had her share of problems with an LDR, that LDRs can be nice too as long as the people involved want to really make it work (which works for any relationship). I did not of course present my views in such lucidly worded detail.
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Bolo bolo....jee khol ke bolo :D